Each quarter I post a review of a leadership/motivational book I recommend to colleagues and friends. Some may be old favorites, others are hot off the press. I am always open to suggestions for books to review. If you have a favorite you'd like to share with others, please contact me.

Do What You Love For The Rest of Your Life
By Bob Griffiths
2001, Ballantine Books.

“If I won the lottery, I’d ________________”

Did you fill in the blank with your current type of work? Even without financial concerns, most of us would still desire a meaningful life, doing something that fulfills us--something we may feel we cannot do with our current responsibilities.

Bob Griffiths decided at age 45 that he could no longer “sell” himself to the world of Wall Street. But, in spite of a salary well over $200,000 per year, he was $100,000 in debt and had a family to support.

Five years later, at age 50, he left Wall Street to live his dream: writing/producing plays, teaching, and speaking.  DO WHAT YOU LOVE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE is a product of his journey as he stepped away from the traditional American Dream and created his own.

The American Dream, Griffiths says, comes at a tremendous price. For him, position, power, and prestige came at a moral and ethical cost. Hanging on to the traditional dream has the highest cost of all--psychic cost.

“My house was full of things, but I was empty.”

The author is very frank about the challenges of starting again.

The financial downshift is “far and away the greatest stumbling block in switching careers.” In hindsight, Griffiths says his fear of downshifting was less about money and more about appearing “less than” in the eyes of his family and peers.

The rewards of his career change have been practical, emotional and spiritual. “Now,” he says, “work is what I do to be fulfilled as I earn money.”

What sets this book apart is the approach Griffiths takes to two crucial aspects of any radical career transition: how to finance such a move, and the affect such a life change can have on the family.

DO WHAT YOU LOVE is structured in two parts. The first 200 (of 300) pages are set up around what Griffiths calls THE EIGHT COMMITMENTS.

Griffiths asks the reader to approach each of these topics from an exploratory, objective, data gathering perspective. He urges the reader to be non-judgmental of what he/she discovers about themselves.

The book is peppered with quotes from the famous:

“100% of the shots you don’t take will never enter the net”--Wayne Gretsky

And from the non-famous who have made the journey from working to support the experiences that feed their soul, to working in a job that feeds their soul and pays the bills “What I do is an extension of who I am.   I am not my work” Lynn age 58

DO WHAT YOU LOVE is not a book to be passively read. If you’re serious about exploring your options, there is work to be done. DO THE EXERCISES!! What is comforting is that most of the work is exploratory, data gathering. You can turn back at any time. There is no risk to this process.

1.  BEGIN!
“A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step”

The first commitment asks the reader to explore, think, and keep an open mind as you begin this journey. It’s OK to be nervous or fearful when taking a step toward moving your dream from your mind to the real world. BEGIN ANYWAY

First assignment: what do you want your career to be like? Write it out--all the wild aspects of it--everything. Hang it on your mirror. LOOK AT IT EVERY DAY.

2. IDENTIFY YOUR “YES, BUTS”
Write down all the excuses you have for why this is not a feasible pursuit right now. All you need to do is write them down. Dealing with them comes later.

Writing them down takes them from being a thought in your head surrounded by emotion to being objective words on a page. Separating fact from feeling is a concept Griffiths repeats throughout the book. Get it out of your head and onto paper where it is easier to deal with.

Money is the principle “yes, but” for most contemplating career change. The words “yes, but” provide an excuse not to do something, Griffiths says. Substitute “and” for but. This simple word change can help you begin thinking of how to deal with the issue, turning an obstacle into an opportunity."

3. IDENTIFY YOUR PASSION
“You are never too young or too old to honor your calling.”

Being passionate about escaping from a job is very different from having a compelling passion to pursue another career. Many have an idea of what they want to do, but need help clarifying. The chapters on identifying your passion help in this area.

Go talk to someone about your ideas: a professional coach or a career counselor. Many community colleges may offer this service free-of-charge. Do some career testing--the Strong Interest Inventory, the Myers-Briggs.

Do not struggle in silence. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Bounce your thoughts off an objective third party, not your family at this point.

4.  THE JOURNEY INWARD (SELF INVENTORY)
“Getting to know the person we are helps us create the person we want to become.”

The self inventory involves creating an itemized description of the skills and abilities used in your current position. Evaluate those skills and abilities on a 1-3 scale (1= excellent) Then rate them again--in terms of how much you enjoy using them.

Why? To be happy in your next job, it’s important to acknowledge your weaknesses and play to your strengths. Ideally you are being called to a career that uses the abilities and skills you are good at and enjoy. A dispassionate look at ourselves helps determine not only who we are, but also what we are good at, what is good for us, and what is toxic.

Griffiths says, “Trust you have more talents than you recognize and that they are applicable in ways you haven’t thought of. Professionally you are more than you think you are.”

Take a second inventory of the personal you. What are we when we take away our career? This audit looks at personal assets and liabilities. Actions and behaviors negative/unhealthy and positive. Begin sentences with “I”.

This inventory helps us get to know ourselves and to get rid of behaviors that “diminish us.” Only by taking action that changes old behaviors and thoughts will we begin to experience improvement.

5. IDENTIFY AND WORK THROUGH YOUR FEARS

• ADMIT fear (everyone is afraid)
• ACCEPT it as normal and permissible (alternative is to beat yourself up about it physically and emotionally)
• IDENTIFY it--write it down and all the fears connected to it.

If we consider fear a given, our choice comes in how we respond to it.

Think of the first time you drove the car alone. Of course you were afraid (and probably very excited)--but you did it. When you got to your destination, having driven was what made you giddy. Getting to your destination was a bonus.

6. INVOLVE FAMILY IN YOUR CAREER CHANGE
Griffiths recognizes and discusses how each of us is part of a system. Any decision we make to change will affect the rest of the system--spouse, partner, children,

Our family can be our support or can work against us on the change. We do them and ourselves a disservice by assuming we know which path they will take. We, as the career changer, have some emotions around the change, so we need to be very clear in our own mind on what we want to say when we broach the subject with them.

“I hate that *%#^ place. It’s killing me” VS “We’ve discussed how burned out I am in my job. I’ve been giving it a lot of thought and I want to talk with you about changing my career (or going back to work etc.)”

Career changes involving an income shift will also shift the balance of power in many families. The more deeply the family is defined by status and materialism, the greater the perceived threat of career change. Griffiths took a 90% drop in income and relinquished his role as the primary breadwinner.

Children in a family also have expectations. Things were simpler when most of us were children. Today, many people have mortgaged their identities to possessions and position and this flows over onto the children. Involving children in discussions of the change and its impact on the family is important.

7. STRAIGHTEN OUT YOUR FINANCES
“The best things in life are not always things” --anonymous

Money is the biggest “yes, but” for most people. Three chapters are devoted to the topic. Instead of looking strictly at the numbers, Griffiths asks the reader to examine the role of money and consumption in his/her life.

It’s more than consumption, Griffiths postulates, it’s about filling an emptiness. Ask yourself, “What hole or emptiness am I seeking to fill? What is the lack that fuels the desire to consume?”

The hole will NEVER be filled with material things. What will fill it? Spend some time with this question. Be honest with your answer. Write it out (which helps separate feeling from fact).

Building your financial freedom plan involves acknowledging if you are in debt and being willing to do whatever it takes to resolve the problem--including accepting responsibility for the current state of affairs.

If money management is a problem, seek help. You may have the ability to manage your money but not the skill. Learn the skill.

Determine your assets and liabilities (what you own and what you owe). Examine the circumstances that created the debt. The book offers tools and formulas to help figure this out.

Don’t judge yourself...accept and move forward. Take action. Pay your savings account right after your mortgage payment. We often pay ourselves last. Saving toward new career is important!!!

Leave your credit and debit cards in a drawer for 3 months. Painful as it is, this keeps impulse buying down and calls attention to when and where you tend to spend. Keep a chart of your spending. Again, a tool, unique from others seen, is provided.

Griffiths spends quite a few pages talking about the idea of generational upscaling and how we have bought into the idea of sacrificing our dreams under the assumption that our children will only succeed if we sacrifice. It is an argument some may find may find troubling, others may see it as intriguing.

Griffiths says what underlies all of this is fear: fear that children won’t make it in the money-obsessed world, fear that kids will see parents as failures if not given more than parents had, and fear that others will perceive all involved as “less than.” These fears are not about the kids, they are about you.

8. HAVE FAITH
A chapter looking at faith in the process, belief and trust in the possibilities, supported, if it be the readers choice by spiritual faith.

FINALLY
Last 100 pages of the book looks at tactics and strategies to move into the new career, be it self employment or within a new organization.

In these tactical pages he reviews:

• resigning with grace--and burning no bridges
• resume structures and does and don’t
• cover letters: examples and tips
• his view of “choosing” your new employer
• starting own business: the importance of business plan, coping with erratic cashflow, the discipline and hard work required. Are you OK with unpredictability?

Griffiths ends with a review of the trade-offs:

• emotional/spiritual renewal VS identity issues (I am my job)
• financial freedom VS old tapes of what success is and looks like.

DO WHAT YOU LOVE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE is a must read if you are contemplating a change in career or function. It looks at change, family, and money issues in a way other books have not covered with such depth.

The theme of non-judgment around indecision to take the step, getting out of debt, and being afraid, hooked this reader early on. Introducing Commitment #1 BEGIN, he said “there is no risk in this process, you can turn back at any time.” As long as I can turn back, I can find the courage to move forward.

“YOUR VALUE LIES IN YOUR SELF-WORTH, NOT IN YOUR NET WORTH”

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