Each quarter I post a review of a leadership/motivational book I recommend to colleagues and friends. Some may be old favorites, others are hot off the press. I am always open to suggestions for books to review. If you have a favorite you'd like to share with others, please contact me.

Breakthrough Networking: Building Relationships That Last
By Lillian Bjorseth
2003, Duoforce Enterprises.

Relationships are key for survival in the world of work. They are the bedrock of business, of getting things done. Daniel Goleman, author of “Emotional Intelligence” and “Working with Emotional Intelligence,” cites the inability to build and maintain relationships as the # 1 cause of executive derailment.

Breakthrough Networking is jam packed with tips and techniques to help both the business networker and the looking-for-a-job networker become a more effective relationship builder.

Building relationships begins with you, says author Lillian Bjorseth. What you know of yourself, how you feel about yourself and how you come across to others.

This four part book is built around the premise that networking is a skill. To do it well takes desire, knowledge and practice.

When I begin a business book, I want to see added value right away. My time is too precious to wade through 50 pages of theory before getting to what I can use in the real world. I want to be hooked with usable information NOW.

Breakthrough Networking hooked me in less than 20 pages with the “Networking Style Quiz.” Despite years of networking, I never considered my style. Instead, I chided myself for not feeling as at ease in a roomful of strangers as I imagined others to be. Based on the behavioral style model of DISC, the Quiz reveals four distinct networking styles: Dauntless, Indefatigable, Supportive, and Careful.

Here’s a nutshell look at the strengths and limitations of each style (you’ll have to buy the book for all the skinny).

DAUNTLESS

• Strengths: firm handshakes, strong eye contact, meets strangers with ease
• Limitations: dislikes small talk, interrupts, forgets names, takes over if given an opportunity.

INDEFATIGABLE

• Strengths: makes others feel welcome, believes in the basic good and honesty of people, animated and enthusiastic.
• Limitations: can be disorganized, can be easily hurt, overstays welcome

SUPPORTIVE:

• Strengths: calm, a good listener, responds thoughtfully, is genuine (what you see is what you get
• Limitations: waits for others to approach them, uncomfortable in a roomful of strangers

CAREFUL

• Strengths: outwardly unruffled, stores data for later, reads body language well
• Limitations: aloof, can appear guarded, cautious may miss opportunities
  prefers to do things alone, the “right” way

Bjorseth provides suggestions for how each style might improve limitations and gives the rest of us strategies on how most effectively recognize, communicate and network with each style.

Part II takes on personal and printed image with what Bjorseth calls “impression management.”

We’ve all heard “you never have a second chance to make a first impression.”

But how many of us consider that the first impression can be made through our printed materials or our non-verbals as when we walk into a room?

Our body language is a huge communicator (55% of our message) and it is tough to fake because it’s subliminal. Readers are reminded of the basics: posture, handshakes, eye contact and given tips on how to read the body language of others.

The book also tackles printed image. Your literature is your company. It conveys your spirit and your image. Time and money should be spent on making sure your printed materials are quality and send the message you intend.

Part III shifts focus, asking the reader to consider: what do you want from your networking? Do you have a strategy? How do you determine which groups to join?

People spend precious dollars joining a multitude of organizations and then get no return on their investment. Before you “get out there,” Bjorseth urges, determine the answers to these simple questions:

• what is the focus of your business/career?
• who are your potential clients/employers?
• where can you best meet them?

Most importantly--once you have joined get involved. Silently filling a seat at the monthly meeting will not help you reach your goal.

One of the most value-added tips for this reader was the “verbal business card.”

How many times have you been asked at meetings and networking events to introduce yourselves and say something about what you do? How many times have you cringed at what came out of your mouth?

The simple technique I use from the book calls for trading company name and how I do the work for turning features into benefits. In other words, state your name and the benefit others derived from your service (product).

For example:

"I'm Jerilyn Willin and I help organizations reduce the cost of doing business by improving the performance and contribution of their employees and teams."

The goal is to be understood and remembered. The interested can then approach you to ask “How do you _________?”

Breakthrough Networking provides tip after tip to help the reader achieve networking goals. Do you know the answer to these questions? Reading the book will give you the answer and increase your effectiveness as a networker.

• How do you make sure you have business cards handy and don’t mix those you are collecting with those you are handing out?
• How can you insure you don’t run out of business cards or get caught without one?
• What method is there to remember who is who once you get back to the office with a fistful of cards?
• Where should your nametag be worn?
• Where is the “power seat” located at a conference table” 

Book goes on to offer ideas, techniques, and guidelines for:

• making a room of strangers less inhibiting,
• the mechanics of introductions,
• making small talk and very important--how to break away from a conversation and move on without leaving a poor impression.

Networking is more than the night of the event. Building the relationship means following up, via e-mail, notes, arranging for future meetings, lunches, etc. Do you know the protocol for host and guest at a business lunch?

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